A man goes into a shop, the sign above which reads "Birds-in-Trees".
Shopkeeper: Good morning, sir. How may I help you?
Man: Good morning. I'd like a puffin in a plum tree please.
Shopkeeper: Excuse me?
Man: A puffin in a plum tree please.
Shopkeeper: Do you know, sir, that's the first time anyone's ever asked for that combination! I've got everything from an albatross in an almond tree to a wren in a willow tree but no puffins and no plum trees. Are you dead-set on that particular bird-in-tree?
Man: Well, I did think it had rather a nice sound to it . . .
Shopkeeper: I agree with you, sir, it does have a certain something. Did you come up with that pairing yourself?
Man: Well, to tell you the truth, I'm writing a song, or rather carol, for Christmas, you know.
Shopkeeper: A songwriter! That is impressive.
Man: Well, it's not finished yet, and I always find that acting out the lyrics of my songs helps me in the writing process . . . I suppose I'm what you'd call a method songwriter.
Shopkeeper: A Christmas carol, you say?
Man: That's right. And the singer of the song is telling the listeners all the things her true love has sent to her over the twelve days of Christmas.
Shopkeeper: I follow you.
Man: And on the first day I thought it would be fun for her to receive a puffin in a plum tree.
Shopkeeper: And you want to actually send your true love a puffin in a plum tree to help you in the songwriting process?
Man: That's it in one!
Shopkeeper: Well, like I said, no puffins and no plum trees. I'm very sorry about that.
Man: Do you have any other birds-in-trees starting with "P" perhaps?
Shopkeeper: Let me check to see what we have on hand . . . Birds first . . . Here we are. We have pigeons, plovers, pelicans . . . oh and a few partridges.
Man: Partridges, eh? Hmm.
Shopkeeper: As for trees we have palm trees, papaw trees, peach trees . . . and what's this . . . oh yes we have one pear tree left too.
Man: One pear tree, you say? Partridge . . . pear . . . [beating out the meter] a partridge in a pear tree! You know, I do believe that's even better than a puffin in a plum tree! That's it! [singing] On the first day of Christmas my true love sent to me / A partridge in a pear tree!
Shopkeeper: That's a very catchy tune, sir.
Man: Thank you very much. And thank you even more for not having any puffins and plum trees in stock!
Shopkeeper: Delighted to be of assistance, sir. I'm assuming you would like your partridge in a pear tree gift-wrapped?
Man: I would indeed.
Shopkeeper: Excellent. Oh and I almost forgot: we're giving away a free gift with every bird-in-tree bought today.
Man: How very generous. What is it?
Shopkeeper: Two turtle doves.
